Deep Thoughts: Attachments

the thing i've always found odd about attachments is once you are attached you can't imagine how you ever managed to live otherwise.

they form so quietly. like roots tangling under the earth. you can't see it happening. can't mark the progress. but you can feel it. only you don't believe it because all you have is a feeling. no proof. until it's too late. and those roots go deep.

and when i finally realize the attachment is real, i hate myself for not believing myself sooner. for not having dug it up when i still had the chance.

i guess, you can dig them up at any time. but oh what a mess.

***

i wonder how some people do it. remain so calm. it's almost as if they're not really there at all. i can look at them. taste their skin. smell their scents. but then i blink and they're just ghosts again.

i don't know how they do it. cuz everything makes me so angry. so upset.

i don't admire their indifference. i pity it.

even passionately hating life is still better than feeling nothing of it.

friend is a broad term. too broad for me.

and time only serves to make it that more evident.

as day by day. night by night. those attachments become ever more meaningless.

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