Dear Brother

"one of us should not be pathetic." that's what i said. "and you have the better chance at it."

"oh, i should punch you!"

"would you really hit me?"

"no, you're too weak."

and off i went into various examples of how unweak i am. he still didn't punch me. i never thought he would.

but how are we siblings at all really, how are we related, family, if we can't say to eachother what we're really thinking.

i meant it. my mother shoud not have to go to sleep at night knowing both of her offspring are useless offcasts of society. and out of the two of us, he stands a way better chance, if only he'd set his sites on some girl who's already graduated high school.

"i just come here to watch the amazing race, cuz i don't have that channel."

"i'll pay your cable bill."

"i can't let you. on principle."

he said i was mean to him last night because i told him he was here all the time and it was getting on my nerves. i said it for myself. that is true. but not just. he shouldn't be here all the time. not because i don't want him to. but because he ought to be living his life. one of us should.